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The Hidden Almanac for
Friday January 13th, 2017
Episode 517
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Previous episode: 2017-01-11
Next episode: 2017-01-16

Summary

Today we recall a treasure hunt with dire results. And then we are interrupted by Pr. Drom who is seeing things, and in the garden, it should be cold.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.

Transcription

Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is January 13th, 2017. 

It was on this day in 1722 that an old man passed away in the town of Lintz, leaving behind a map that led to a supposedly fabulous treasure. Though the map was unlabeled, the old man was reputed to have been a pirate in his youth, and thus any document with a large X on it and a compass rose must, the theory went, involve buried treasure.

To the sorrow of the old man’s heirs, after solving a series of fiendish puzzles, they located a box at the bottom of a dry well, which contained within it—

D: Mord, you got a thing on your face!

I beg your pardon?

D: A thing! I mean, it’s not your face, because you don’t really have a face, but there’s a little—it’s sticking out under the mask—

Ah. Yes. These things happen. 

D: No they don’t! That thing was like—greenish! People do not have greenish sticky-outy things!

I am certain that it was nothing. Who among us has not had lint stick to one’s clothes occasionally? I shall speak severely to the laundry service.

D: It wasn’t lint! Lint does not look like that! I have taught freshman, Mord, I know what lint looks like!  

It was nothing. You are worrying yourself needlessly, Drom. Now, I am certain that somewhere…elsewhere…some emotionally damaged soul requires your wisdom.

D: …well, now I KNOW you’re lying.

In the garden, as the temperature outside fluctuates rapidly, a reminder that the seeds of many perennials require cold stratification. Coral bells, catmint, St. John’s Wort, and many hibiscus varieties will need to be subject to cold temperatures in order to germinate successfully. If you are already past the coldest months in your locale, some time spent in a refrigerator can be effective before sowing in spring.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also brought to you by the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Cucumbers. As you peruse the seed catalogs this winter, remember that cucumbers are perfect the way that nature made them. Do not fall prey to the temptation of pickling cucumbers and other such travesties!

That’s the Hidden Almanac for January 13th, 2017. Be safe and stay out of trouble.

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