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The Hidden Almanac for
Friday June 19th, 2015
Episode 271
The Hidden Almanac
Previous episode: 2015-06-17
Next episode: 2015-06-22

Summary[]

Today we celebrate a marriage with a centuries long impact. We also remember the dumping of tea into Echo Harbor. It is the Feast Day of St. Raster, and in the garden, there are squash.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.

Transcription[]

Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is June 19th, 2015.

It was on this day in 1640 that Princess Alma married into the royal house of Troyzantium, finally ending the century of hostility that had followed the Spice Wars. Princess Alma, great-granddaughter of Prince Sergei III, lived to a great old age in Troyzantium and had nine children. The marriage ushered in a lasting and mostly uneventful peace, but descendants of this union included the Librarian Prince. The verdict is still out on whether it was good thing.

And it was on this day in the Year of Coiled Chains that a boatload of tea was dumped into Echo Harbor. It was intended as a protest against unfair taxation, but, this being Echo Harbor, the tea promptly turned into screaming eels. The protesters said that they meant to do that, but several prominent historians point out that those who lived within earshot of the eels rapidly became disillusioned with the revolution.

It is the Feast Day of Saint Raster, who converted the vectors.

In the garden, the interns have thrown a blanket over the employee who went mad and are now debating what to do about the opened pit. Obviously the thing to do was to fill the hole with concrete before they opened the sealed slab, but apparently the CharmX corporation is insisting that they just need to get in there and clean things out so that drilling can continue. The interns are considering mounting an expedition out of curiosity. At least…they say it is curiosity. As many listeners may remember, the interns had a problem last year with the standing stone in the frog pond. It has left many of them…susceptible…to outside influences.

I am not saying that there is an ancient evil squatting in the pit whispering madness into the mental ears of the interns, I am simply saying that I would not bet the station’s funding against it.

I have attempted to distract them by ordering them to hand-water the squash, but they do keep drifting toward the opening. I suppose it will sort itself out.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also brought to you by Rent-a-Yeti! Think that summer is too hot for yeti? You’re absolutely right! Most yetis would roast in their fur in this weather! But fortunately, we stock only the finest skunk apes, bred for southern heat, and are happy to rent them to gardeners in desperate need of a yeti. Contact Rent-a-Yeti today!

That’s the Hidden Almanac for June 19th, 2015. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.

Outro[]

Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, written by Ursula Vernon and performed and produced by Kevin Sonney. Our theme music is Moon Valley and our exit music is Red in Black, both by Kosta T. You can hear more from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. All other content is copyright 2013 through 2015, Ursula Vernon.

Notes[]

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