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The Hidden Almanac for
Wednesday November 5th, 2014
Episode 180
The Hidden Almanac
Previous episode: 2014-11-03
Next episode: 2014-11-07

Summary[]

Today marks the day a great book was published. It is also the day the dog visited the gardens, and the day the gauze came. It is the Feast Day of Despair, and in the garden, it is getting dark.

Be Safe, and Stay Out of Trouble.

Transcription[]

Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is November 5th, 2014.

It was on this day in the Year of Exhalation that the city of Echo Harbor was suddenly draped in shrouds of a thin, gauzy fabric. This fabric extended in all directions, falling from rooftops and gutters, layers upon layers. It was easily pushed aside and proved more of a nuisance than anything else. A few prominent citizens remarked on it’s distressing resemblance to giant cobwebs, but of course there are no known spiders that large. The fabric was shoveled away and recycled into low-cost paving material.

And it was on this day in 1988 that a small grey dog walked into the Royal Botanical Gardens. It looked around, urinated on a few flowers, and then curled up around the Oracular Arum. The next time the gardeners looked for it, it had vanished, and there was a perfectly carved statue of a small grey dog in its place. It was rather distressing. The statue has remained unmolested and some of the gardeners leave it bones and put blankets over it when the weather turns, just in case it is only sleeping in some peculiar fashion.

And it is the anniversary of the publication, in 1833, of the great volume “On the Descriptions of Jellyfish” which included color plates of all the jellyfish known in the world at the time. The author, one Harold Jobs, insisted that all the illustrations be life size. He refused to budge on this, and so “On the Descriptions of Jellyfish” is twenty feet by ten feet and consists of only six plates and accompanying descriptions. The Lion’s Mane Jelly takes up the first page, after which, it must be said, the other jellyfish are something of an anticlimax. Fifteen volumes sold to museums and two to private collectors. As Jobs had ordered eleven hundred copies made to keep up with anticipated demand, he lived the rest of his days in poverty, in a house built of remaindered jellyfish books.

It is the Feast Day of Despair. For many centuries, it was thought that one should not feed despair, as that only caused it to grow. Now it is believed that despair responds well to a plate of food and a cup of hot tea. Offerings can be left on the doorstep or at the bottom of the garden. It might help.

In the garden, it is growing dark early. The skies are overcast, the leaves are turning. Tomorrow night is the Beaver Moon. If you go out to your nearest beaver lodge, you will see them dancing on the surface of the water. It is a rare and disturbing sight.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Red Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of fine and inaccessible teas. Red Wombat --- “We Dig Tea.”

Also brought to you by Grim Reaper Cereal. Check out our new Sugar Scythes, now with marshmallow skulls! Tasty and arguably nutritious!

That’s the Hidden Almanac for November 5th, 2014. Be safe, and stay out of trouble.

Outro[]

Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, and is written by Ursula Vernon. Our exit music is Red in Black and our into music is Moon Valley, both by Kosta T. You can hear more music from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. The Hidden Almanac is copyright 2013-2014, Ursula Vernon.

Notes[]

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