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The Hidden Almanac for
Friday October 31st, 2014
Episode 178
The Hidden Almanac
Previous episode: 2014-10-29
Next episode: 2014-11-03

Summary[]

It is All Hallow’s Eve. It is also The Feast Day of all the Dead, and in the garden, there are whippoorwills. With the very cute crows.

Be Safe, and Stay Indoors.

Transcription[]

Welcome to the Hidden Almanac, I’m Reverend Mord.

Today is October 31st, 2014.

It is All Hallow’s Eve. The dead walk tonight. Depending on your societal context, this is either a good thing or a troubling thing. If your beloved friends and family are returning to make sure that you remember them and to assure you of the continuity of existence, then congratulations on the health of your cultural coping mechanisms.

For some of us, however, we are being surrounded by the unloved and unhallowed dead, owing to poor choices made by our society some centuries ago. I will assume that you have set out the carvings and the corpse-candles, the food offerings and so forth, as any sensible person would have done. If you have not, please do so before sun down, for your own safety.

It is the Feast Day of All the Dead. Someday it will be our feast day. It is important to treat the spirits as you wish someday to be treated. Welcome them. Cautiously.

Also, buy the good candy. Spirits get extremely angry if you give them raisins.

In the garden, the crows are chanting the unspeakable name over and over in chorus. They have even abandoned the Cheetos. At night, they quiet down, but the whippoorwills have taken up the chanting. Whippoorwills do not deserve the bad press heaped upon them by certain authors. They are quite peaceful birds, but large numbers are generally a sign that something dreadful is going to happen. This is not the whippoorwill’s fault. They won’t even eat you. They are insectivores.

As the crows’ chanting rises, I confess, I fear for our safety. It remains, however, adorable.

The Hidden Almanac is brought to you by Dark Wombat Tea Company, purveyors of terrible and unspeakable teas. Dark Wombat --- “Tea. For the Dead.”

Also brought to you by the Happy Lime Juice company! We take the happiest fruits and hug them until they pop! Hug a delicious Happy Lime Juice pack today!

That’s the Hidden Almanac for October 31st, 2014. Be safe, and may the saints have mercy on us all.

Outro[]

Out of Character

The Hidden Almanac is a production of Dark Canvas Media, and is written by Ursula Vernon. Our exit music is Red in Black and our into music is Moon Valley, both by Kosta T. You can hear more music from Kosta T at the Free Music Archive. The Hidden Almanac is copyright 2013-2014, Ursula Vernon.

Notes[]

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